joi, 22 aprilie 2010
Something new, Something old
The last few days have been dark. Maybe darker than ever. I've never been this close to crossing the fine line between conscience and indifference. I've never wanted so badly to give up.
What stopped me?
I still don't know. I infer it might've been the sum of faith in some long lost values, in a long lost me, in a long lost universe.
Today something interesting happened.
I feel like a bandage has been put over my desperation and hopelessness. Can't exactly understand why. My situation hasn't changed in any way: I still have a short period of time to go until my finals, an empty head, the same difficulties in studying and I'm still afraid as hell that I’ve stupidly auto sabotaged my future.
But something feels good.
May it be the idea of hope renewed, the idea of having contact with someone who actually had the courage, guidance, self-confidence and talent to pursue his dream, or may it just be the power of a correctly assembled array of guitar performed notes.
I need to fight. This time... more than ever.